WELL-BEHAVED veggies – whatever next! Will we grow sociable savoys or polite peas? Or maybe even respectful radishes or courteous courgettes?
Whatever the unlikely scenario, seed and plant experts Dobies are introducing vegetables which – they predict – will have perfect manners on both plot and plate.
The Devon-based firm go on to say: “You wouldn’t invite troublemakers around for a dinner party so why invite them into the veg patch!”
What, then, are Dobies cooking up here? Well, as well as providing a humorous touch to press releases, rather than issuing conventional straight-laced ones, there’s an important message in what they have to say . . . and I get it – I think.
What they are stressing is that this new contingent is top-quality, weather and disease-resistant, robust growers, thoroughly reliable and, top of the credentials, supremos on the tastebuds.
All of which, presumably, add up to impeccable manners on the plot or in the garden.
On the latest Dobies menu:
■ Cauliflower Zaragoza F1 – tight white curds, large outer leaves for added protection, clubroot resistant, stands well (£3.49, sow Feb-July).
■ Sweetcorn Illusion F1 – tender, super-sweet, good in UK climate (£2.99, March-May).
■ Kale Oldenboer, another F1 – compact, uniform plants, very cold-tolerant (£2.99, March-May).
■ Carrot Cascade – an improved Chantenay with added F1 vigour, super-sweet (£2.99, early Feb-July).
■ Pea Sugar Lace – crunchy, juicy and sweet, perfect for kids’ lunch boxes, a much-improved sugar snap pea and so polite as they snap only when you bite (£2.99, March-June).
■ Brussels sprout Gladius – said to be a mild-mannered F1 with no bitterness (£3.99, Feb-April).
▲ No-nonsense veggies: From top – carrot Cascade, cauliflower Zaragoza, brussels sprout Gladius.
■ Organic cauliflower Skywalker – a cold-tolerant F1 hybrid which, insist Dobies, will keep rebel forces out of the veg patch, including Jedi warriors. The Dobies press office then add further spice to their prose by announcing: “Like Luke, this farm boy has risen from humble beginnings, so will it become one of the greatest cauliflowers the galaxy has ever known. We’ll have to wait and see (£3.49, March-April/Aug-Sept).
Phew! Steady on, Dobies. The die is cast. Now it’s up to you gardeners to reap the rewards.
Final word from me to the kids: Go help your mum and dad sow those seeds, watch ’em grow and savour every mouthful.
▲ http://www.dobies.co.uk / 0344 9670303